Boys expectations when dating
We all know the current of discourse running through our social media feeds, our text conversations, internet threads and beyond — men bemoan the fact that women just can’t seem to settle down for a “nice guy” like themselves and seek to justify this claim with a gazillion examples of instances where someone is dating a not-so-nice person instead of them, proclaiming boastfully and loudly, Women, on the other hand, are quite clear about their ideas, their expectations, their desires, and their wants, and a quick glance of many of the women writing here on Medium, especially the feminists, will show that women have no shortage of things to say when it comes to their critiques of men in contemporary society and what they want…if only the men who commit to these practices and say these things were listening, but they wrote off women a long time ago as somehow being not worth listening to, while simultaneously complaining about a lack of action or so much as a date.Men seem to intuit as wrongly as they do naturally that if they were only just bigger jerks, women would love them.(I know you know that they are different than us in fundamental ways.) You know I’m a dating and relationship coach and I guide women dating after 40 to love.
You don’t tell your partner directly what you expect from each other because you fear rejection.
To put it in more philosophically descriptive terms, the niceness was only a secondary condition, a conditional property, and instrumental utility of the expectations implied in the niceness — the niceness wouldn’t have happened without the expectation, and once these guys get rejected, they often turn vicious, enraged, degrading, and even violent.
They retort, calling women all sorts of degrading names to reclaim their bruised ego and sense of injured pride and merit. Let me explain…Human interactions aren’t transactions. Women aren’t vending machines that we put niceness coins into and sex magically falls out.
Is your system based on what your mom or dad taught you that you boys do?
Is it left-over from a list you devised in college, or even high school?